<sigh> I know it has been a while!! I have been soaking up all of the love and cuddles from my little boy. But now it is back to business.
I have noticed that since becoming a new mom I have been getting all sorts of unsolicited advice. Let me first say that I do welcome all and any help when I ask for it…..key word ASK! That being said, I have decided to write a post of advice that was given to me by my older counterparts.
Lets’ jump right into old and new school parenting!
The very first thing I heard was “You should not be going anywhere after you have that baby! At least 6 weeks, you are still open.” I literally had to laugh at this because I could have sworn that my doctor stitched up my 2nd degree tear after I had my baby. In all seriousness not going out is simply unrealistic in my world. It is true that your body do need time to recover and heal but damn it’s not like we are going to go run a marathon before out 6 week check-up. Let’s all come together and tell the older generation to please Please PLEASE stop telling us this! I was going crazy after four days in the house
On the top of my list was “Give that baby a lil cereal, that breast milk is not holding him.” The demand of breastfeeding is stressful enough, so if you ever want to piss a mother off whom has made the choice to breastfeed DO NOT utter those words to her. I try to remember that 30 or so years ago that was the norm for most parents, therefore I hold my tongue for the most part…until I hear it again. So instead of saying screw you and your cereal, I simply educate them with the facts that are known today.
Another thing I heard was “Don’t hold that baby all day, you will spoil them” I’m sorry sir but what am I spoiling my child with…..love? I know that one day I will miss my child being this tiny and before I know it he will be out in this world living his own life so yes I will hold him 24 hours if I choose to.
The funniest advice I was given was “Wash your hair before you have that baby. You won’t be able to until after 6 weeks.” What?! First let me say that I have natural hair, and I would wash my hair once a week depending on style. The only reason I followed this advice was because I had a sew-in installed in my hair. Since having a baby, having alone time to take a shower has been heaven for me, add in an extra 10 minutes to wash my hair and I will be a different woman!
In the future if you would like to give advice to “new school” parents, how about advice that we could actually use such as: dealing with constipation after pregnancy, sweating at night when it seems cool to everyone else, and building up the courage to look down there after giving birth just to name a few. Uncomfortable…yes, but we need to hear it.
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